August 7, 2006

Books help kids cope with first-day jitters

My 5-year-old daughter, Kelly, starts kindergarten in September. She is stressing about it, having nightmares, and says she'll miss me and her little sister. I'm so concerned that I called to set up a teacher conference, but I got the custodian who says no one is there until school starts. What can I do to calm her worries?

Most schools aren't ready for conferences during the weeks prior to opening, but it's worth trying to set up a simple "walk through" to give Kelly a sense of security that first day. In most districts, teachers and administrators report several days before students. Persist, and you'll find an understanding staffer who can schedule a quick tour so Kelly can become familiar with the school's layout. Guide her explicitly. Show her where she'll get off the bus and where she'll enter school. Point out the cafeteria, bathrooms, library and so on. If possible, visit her classroom, building anticipation with a comment like, "On your first day, your teacher, Mrs. Carson, will have put up bulletin boards especially for you and your classmates. Just think, this might be your desk!" If Mrs. Carson happens to be there, even better.

Along with a tour and pep talk, read to Kelly some of the many wonderful "first day of school" books available, suggests Carl Harvey, library media specialist, North Elementary School, Noblesville, Ind. and adviser to Library Media Connection. "Sharing books about starting kindergarten presents an opportunity to talk through her concerns. Kelly will see she's not the only one with first-day fears."

Here are a few of Harvey's favorites:

"Wemberly Worried" by Kevin Henkes (Harper Collins, 2000). Wemberly, a worrier by nature, worries about the start of school. What if the teacher is mean? What if the room smells bad? Once school begins, she quickly makes a friend.

"I Am Too Absolutely Small for School" by Lauren Child (Candlewick Press, 2004). Lola says she isn't ready for school. Her brother Charlie explains everything she could learn, but Lola comes up with reason after reasons to stay home. But like Wemberly, she quickly finds a friend and learns that Charlie was right.

"Miss Bindergarten Gets Ready for Kindergarten" by Joseph Slate (Dutton, 1996). In this first of a charming six-book series, readers go through the alphabet meeting Mrs. B's students and watch her set up the classroom and get supplies ready for the year.

"Look Out Kindergarten, Here I Come" by Nancy Carlson (Puffin, 2001). Henry the mouse has plenty of last minute jitters, but after a tour of his classroom and meeting a new friend he quickly decides that kindergarten will be fun.

"Tucker's Four-Carrot School Day" by Susan Winget (HarperCollins, 2005). Tucker the rabbit is unsure as he enters school the first day, but his teacher senses his uneasiness and helps him adjust to school and feel like part of the class.

"Countdown to Kindergarten" by Alison McGhee, (Harcourt, 2002). A distraught 5-year-old is convinced -- because a first grader told her -- that kindergarten has rules that she won't be able to manage. (Teachers aren't allowed to help you tie your shoes, no stuffed animals and so on). As the first day arrives she goes to great lengths to get rid of her shoelaces! Once at school, all the rumors are put to rest!

"Pepper Goes to School" by Linda Bleck (Little Simon, 2006) is a whimsical tale of a dog not allowed on the bus who went to school anyway to be part of owner Lily's "show and tell." With tabs, pulls and pop-ups, it offers an up-beat look at the pace of a school day.

"It's My School" by Sally Grindley (Walker, 2006) is a heartwarming story of an older brother who worries that his younger sister, just starting kindergarten, might embarrass him.

Two books turn the tables and show that teachers, too, can be anxious about the first day, says Harvey. In "Mr. Ouchy's First Day" by B.G. Hennessy (Putman, 2006), Mr. Ouchy frets about his first year as a teacher. In "First Day Jitters" by Julie Danneberg (Charlesbridge, 2000), teacher Mrs. Hartwell tries to convince Sarah that she will love her new school. Only at the end do we discover her true role. These stories help children realize that everyone can be a little uneasy about starting something new.

LIBRARIAN TIP

"Read daily with your child" is critically important advice teachers give parents when children start school, says school library media specialist Carl Harvey. "Often, the books you read can help a child cope with problems, challenges, anxieties and growing pains -- from the arrival of a new sibling to the loss of a loved one. Many are wonderfully illustrated stories that allow readers or listeners to see how others deal with life's ups and downs. If your child needs help getting over an emotional hurdle, ask your local children's or school librarian to recommend titles that might bring perspective or comfort. They can quickly help you select appropriate books to share."

A-Plus Advice For Parents, aplusadvice.com

Back to Kindergarten Readiness